yang saye btol2 rase..

menyampah.bosan.marah.

yup,once and for all,

i nd to say dis.

wpon bkn sume org yg bkenaan bc my blog,

at least 2 3 kerat yg bc ni tau la pe yg saye rase.

mybe i wud sound childish to some

tp anda kna phm juge

manusia biase akan rs mnyampah ble dgr ayt yg sme

msk dlm telinga mreka slame 21 tahun(for my case)

da cair ear sh*t da ni..

saye adalah slh sorg mnusia biase itu

mgkn saye mnymbot ayt2 anda dgn wjh yg tsnyum(snym sinis)

atau wajah manis tsengih spt tidak ade ape2 prasaan

tp pcayelah,kdg2 saye rs nk bg penampar je kpd anda2 yg bkata2 itu.

jika bkn pnampar pn,mgkn akn tkeluar ayt2 krg sopan spt

tuttt..tuttttt dan juge tuttttttttt..(go figure)

jd mgkn skg korg tertny2

"ape dak ni nk ckp sbnrnye?"

oh! ye,yg saye nk ckp ialah

pliss stop talking bout my weight.
i try so hard 2 take it as a (lame)joke

and i acknowledge my lacking in KGs o lbs o any unit u used to weigh weight.

even i noe im superskinny(mengaku),flat o wateve u call it

tp tlg la ye,stop making it sound so disgusting

o like ive done a great deal of sin.

saket jiwa,saket ati sume ad.

kalo saye ni aneroxic ke bulimic ke

xpela jgk.mgkn saye akn bersorak keriangan for the constant reminder

setelah penat berdiet,ade juge hasilnye.

tp tidak ye.tidak sme skali.

saye mkn dgn normalnye,kdg2 tlebeh dr normal

saye mkn dgn bsgguh2 utk mnambah brt bdn agr kelihatan normal & sehat

(not like im sick nw)

tp mmg berat 2 x naik2 jge ye

malah saye jge telah bertanyakn skln cepumas kt mak saye.

"mak,nk mnm weight gain bole?"

tp mak saye jwb,"kalo da gemok nnt sebok nk kurus plak.bia jelah"

jd back to d traditional way,mkn& tdo.

wpon telah cbe mkn den tdo dan mkn lg sblm tdo(ulang2 bnyk kali)

tetap xbjaye jge.berat itu stagnant shj.x gerak2 pn

xcaye tny mak saye.

sbnrnye saye tls ni sbb,all those comments have started to take effect

sadly,they effect my confidence level.

saye xske duk around crowd sbb sy rse evry1 will luk at me

n start scrutinizing my figure,

hw skinny i am,

hw weird i look wearing my jeans

when im wearing my shirts

jaoh skali kalo nk pkai bj2 yg org pggl trend skg.

org mst ckp those bj is so unflattering wen on me.

bnyi cm small matter kn?tp ble org ckp bnyk kali

tlintas gak dalam pale ni

"am i dat ugly?"

"do i reali look like a freak?"

i feel like i dun belong around them

my skoolmate,rumet,frens.ntah la.

mybe saye ptt jd aneroxic je.br sume org puas ati.

br la ad rizen jd kurus cm gni.

tp cne nk jd aneroxic kalo saye suke donat,pastas,nasik,meat,kek,biskot,eskrem bla3

n constantly craving for food ble2 mse xkre siang mlm?

sbnrnye my situation sme cm org overweight.

die try diet,exrcise,mkn pil kurus-tp org ttp ckp die gemok.

saye plak underweight-try mkn,tdo,mkn,mkn vitamin itu ini-tp ttp kurus

my prob is the cmplete opposite but has exactly d same effect.

confident level org cm ktrg ni akn bkurg day by day.

tgk cermin ari2,while thinking why we're different.

ye skali lagi,myb korg rs bnda ni kecik

but try put urself in my shoe

(wpon saiz xsme,try mskkn gak kaki 2 dlm kasot saye)

ble saye ckp serios2,org gelak je.wat2 xphm,wat2 pekak.

o mmg jgk drg pekak.nk suh saye wat cne ag br korg nk phm?

nk suh nanges2 dolu,o ngamok2 dl ke?*sigh~

jadi skg saye sgt2 serios.plis stop talking bout my figure.

skg saye try think +ve bout my situation.

at least perot xbuncit,selulit tade,bj sentiasa ad saiz,bole share baju ngn bdk 12 tahun,bole joging o mnari o bsukan wthout bein too concern bout bouncing boobs,n xperlu malu ble org tny pkai bj saiz ape.bole tros jwb 's' or 'm' tanpa segan silu.yang saye plg suke,ble aunty2 ckp,"nnt awk mengandung badan xnaik,sng nk jage".hahahaha.iye,genetik dari mak saye,ank 7 tp bdn maintain mcm ank dare.

lastly nak cakap,tenkiu for the not-much-needed concern bout how i shud look like,accept me as i am coz i reali dont bother how u look like.oke?saye sgt bersyukur saye sehat wpon kurus cmni,i dun need you 2 make me feel less thankful to Allah.skian terima kaseh.^^